September 1st, 2001

A day that changed my life. Rather, one of the days that I first remember changing my life.

My life in the recent months leading up to this day were miserable, at best, and traumatic, at their worst. So, I was no stranger to cruel creatures. I just did not know they had no limitations. I was ignorant of the fact that monsters knew no bounds. I did not know that life does not care how low you are; it will knock you down further.

On September 1st, I lost my birth mother. My Mimi.

At the simple age of 5, I lost my mom. I will not linger on the dark days leading up to this, for that is a different story for a different time. My path split and became an alternate timeline.

No longer was I the girl that was going to spend every weekend having awesome adventures with my Mimi. No longer was I the girl that was going to have nights dedicated to painting or drawing or crafting with my Mimi. I was no longer the girl that would run and laugh and have fun. Make messes. Collect rocks. Sing songs. That girl died the day that my Mimi died.

I became the girl that eventually grew into the woman I am today. This alternate timeline became my timeline. My reality. Sometimes I wonder what happened to the version of me where my mother lived and all the horrors never happened. I wonder if she achieved her goals and lived out her dreams. I wonder what kind of bond she and her Mimi had. These thoughts get me down, still, to this day, but they are easier to explore.

18 years later, it is easier to open up the memory boxes of my Mimi. I know that life is cruel and evil, but I also know that life has wonderful things. Life has happiness. Life has joy. It is what you make it. I like to think that my Mimi would have been glad that I reached this conclusion and have moved on past the misery of her leaving this physical world (or as well as anyone can).

18 years is a long time, but it also passes in a blink of an eye. It grows easier. Some days are more difficult than others, yes. The good days outweigh the bad. May my Mimi continue to rest in peace, however or wherever that may be.

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