Damn. Damn. Damn. Why can I not let it be?
Motions
No more snoozing. No more staring at the ceiling.
Stumbled
My feet are not staying on the path. My shoes are worn. I wanted to go left. So bad. But I tripped on a rock, fell forward, and rolled right. All these years, I was told to turn a certain way. When I stumbled, I fell away from that destination. And I have never felt…
Weight Gain
And froze.
The world sank.
Static.
The voices I had not heard sprang forward. Eager to pierce me with their fangs. Drag me back.
Failure
My life has seemingly amounted to nothing. I feel like an absolute failure. I truly do. I have dropped out of college. I have not done anything with my life. I am not achieving any goals. I am not doing anything. Stop. Stop. Stop. You need to stop thinking like that. You really do. In…
I saw a cat that reminded me of my childhood pet. I felt sad. Cut. Cut. Cut. I saw a group of girls giggling. Why can't I be part of that? No one likes me. Cut. Cut. Cut. I had a nightmare. I woke up in a panic. Cut. Cut. Cut. I got yelled at.…
Get up, Chandra
Get up. Get up. Get up. You can do this. Come on. Get up. Come on. Please? Stop sleeping so much. Come on. Let's do something. Get up. You can do this. Brush your hair. You have lovely long hair. You got this. Please get up. But I just feel so drained. What is the…
Dear Grace (A Letter to My Past Self)
I wish you would listen to me. I really wish you would, but we both know that you won't. You are too trapped in your realm of depression. You are also still a hormonal teenager that is stuck. I know. But, I am writing this now. To you, my younger self. The personality I wrote…
A Journey to Self Love
I have never been the prettiest. I was never popular. Never the skinniest. I was not the one you would pay attention to. I had no pride. Nothing. I was the socially awkward, mean, and fairly weird girl. I was moody and arrogant. I was so caught up in my web of misery. My self…
The simple fact that you are willing to support me astounds me. You have held me through my darkest moments. You have been there for me. I know that I am not always the easiest person to deal with. I make life extremely difficult. But you are always there. Even now, as I struggle, you…