Reaction

I have no response. I have no hopes. I have nothing to give. Nothing left to offer. What am I even doing with myself? What am I doing with myself? What is this mundane madness? There is no room left to react. Nothing left to do. What am I even doing with my life?  

Ideas

It came to me. In the dead of night. These little ideas. Snippets, rather. Not fully formed. Words that long to be written. The darkness wants to be expressed. My scars want to share their story. The desire to express it. Ideas on how. It all came to me. And the path is illuminated. That…

Who am I?

Who am I? I know nothing. I stumbled. I fall. I do not recognize this face looking back at me in the mirror. Who am I?

Trying

I have never tried harder in my life. I have never fought so hard for someone. Yet, it feels... It feels like I am running uphill on ice.

Depressed

I wish I could make you understand there is no logic. No reason. Nothing to justify my feelings. The void is swallowing me. I am drowning. I do not know when I slipped in. I also do not know when I shall slip back out of the depths.

I am sorry

That I am not perfect. Not ideal. I get emotional. Have these outbursts. Do not know how to handle myself. I can not contain myself sometimes. The emotions. Insanity. I am sorry I am not perfect. But thank you for loving me regardless of my flaws.

Even after a little over two years, I sometimes feel the temptation. My arm got a little cut. A small little ouchie. Nothing to fret over. Yet. Moments later.... I felt it. The excitement. The anticipation. The need for more. The demons giggled. Giggled. They tried to pet my hair.  The darkness skittered on the…